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healinginthecards

Comparison is the Thief of Joy


I got incredibly lucky with when I began exploring spirituality and witchcraft. I came onto the 'scene' as some may say, when I was about 12 years old and the internet was not really much more than a search engine with basic websites and forums. The spiritual and pagan communities at that point were still largely operating off of book learning and experience, basically the adults were still driving the car. Now, there is always going to be tomfoolery and misinformation when it comes to human communication, we are imperfect creatures, but there was less ego, less comparitism, less keeping up with the Joneses, everyone seemed enamored with the idea of sharing and learning. Ah, the early internet days.

So, when social media really started taking off, with the rise of instagram and tik tok, we started to kind of run off the rails, and when I say kind of I mean, where the fuck are the rails? The simplicity of practice, the spirituality and connection with the self/others/higher power/spirits/etc. started getting syphoned out and the culture became what it is today. I will refrain from explicitly describing my feelings on witchtok or spiritual instagram but just know I'd rather scoop an eyeball out than sit through them.

We started telling others how to practice, we started dictating and controlling, forcing aesthetic and intention work, gatekeeping. We stopped operating from an intuitive and hearfelt space and started worrying about the prettiest tools, having the 'right' ritual items or making sure we didn't cast spells on an equinox, we stopped following the joy that spiritual connection should give, the stability of self that it provides. Those of us who are tired, traumatized, busy, lacking in pretty tool funds or whatever else may keep one from participating in the perfectly orchestrated and aesthetically sanitized dance we seem to have unwillingly been plunged into, are unable to replicate. In this aspect we as humans begin to compare our practice to others and find ourselves lacking if we are not able to attain the same 'perfection' of Becky the White Witch in Tik Tok. Fuck that.

With some of the biggest sabbats coming up in not just spiritual but secular culture, I am here as a 22 year long practitioner to invite you to get off of social media's idea and representation of practice and get back to yourself. There is no need for someone else to tell you how to practice. Sure, we can learn from others, we can read and research and ask others, that is all incredibly valuable and helpful. The caveat is knowing when to take advice and when to follow your own voice.

My Samhain ritual is so simple. I stay home. I stay quiet, clean my home well, I make a hearty meal, I hand out candy and watch spooky shit. When the kids have deserted the streets I take my spirits some of that meal and I light a candle, some incense and sit with them. November 1st I make it a point to get outside and speak with the higher power and guides. That's it. For me it's perfect. It requires very little, but I feel it in my soul. Make sure you're doing something that is a balm for your spirit.

Comparison is the thief of joy, the burgler of authenticy and the assasin of creative thought. Your practice is yours. Use tools or don't. Buy the expensive sabbat candle because it brings you joy or, use the dollar store candle because that's what you can afford ( you will never catch me spending more than $3 on a ritual candle). Use the beautiful crystals or grab a stone from your Gram's back yard in memory of her. Use the stick you found on a walk as a wand. Deck yourself out and do the ritual that makes you feel powerful and connected, it's just as valid as someone offering simple prayer, as long as both of you feel connected you are doing it perfectly right.


Blessed Be and Blessed Samhain,

Alyssa

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